Poor behaviour is always difficult to deal with and as a parent being consistent all the time can be very hard. If you have just split up from your partner, then emotions will be running high and it's likely that the normal routines will have been changed. It is crucial at this time to try and give good balanced attention to your children, that despite the change in circumstances, and the emotional stress you are experiencing, shows that you are going to be there for them, and still give them the attention they need.
Children crave your attention, and quite often it turns out that bad behaviour is a reliable mechanism for getting your attention
If you get cross with your child when things don’t go right and your child doesn’t do what they should, although this is not nice for them, the child sees this as a way of getting the attention he or she needs, and starts to rely on this as a means of interacting with you on a very personal level. As a result, a very destructive cycle is set up. Reward Charts (sometimes called Star Charts) are great ways to get things working in you and your children’s lives and help your children understand what behaviours you are proud of and how they can contribute to the smooth running of a happy home. By using them you'll really show them that you appreciate their efforts.
Reward Charts, in various shapes and sizes work for any age. After all, think about all those store loyalty cards or 'buy nine coffees get one free' cards that large retail companies use to reward adults for certain desired behaviours. On dadcando we have some lovely Reward Charts and Reward Chart Booklets, designed specifically with the single parent in mind (although they are suitable for any dad or mum). All are quick to download and there is even a sheet of stickers to download so that you can print and make your own stickers if you want and get started right away.
Before you start, make sure you have read the instructions and reward chart rules and if the reward chart is to go between homes, that you have the agreement and buy-in of your ex-partner, because consistency is a major factor in reward chart success.